Government to Tax Internet Use

After a recent poll revealed Trinidad to be the top consumers of porn and social media, the government has decided to implement a tax on internet usage. According to Minister of Finance Colm Imbert, the country will be expected to make a full recovery from the current economic recession within 48 hours:

“When I saw those statistics I was shocked. Even more shocked that my constituency office wasn’t included in that list, but I am thankful. If we really do consume that much pornography, our experts within the ministry expect the economy to fully recover over the next two days”.

Both the government and opposition hope that this taxation will also decrease attacks directed at them via social media by regular citizens, claiming that such criticism is akin to cyber bullying.

“Recent comments made against our tax proposals shows how social media can be used against us. So we say nah, allyuh have to get tax fuh dat”.

The government reasoned that while this new tax wouldn’t put a complete stop to this “cyber bullying”, citizens who choose to do so will be taxed mercilessly warning citizens:

“If yuh name man, go online”.



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